Happy Birthday to my first niece and nephew

A little early, but I was thinking of you both yesterday, and some words just popped into my head for you....missed you so much while I was away, and now I feel like I'm missing you again, because you're getting so grown up - I still get the hugs and kisses, though, so I guess I shouldn't complain......anyway, here it is......

For Sorcha and Cammy

Sometimes I can't breathe for thinking of you both,
young, pudgy - so innocently sweet.
But you grew up - you both grew up -
from curly red hair, and reddy blonde crown,
to both of you ten - big and strong.
And sometimes I think of those little moments
those times we shared when you were too young to know it

...but I knew it....

and I still think of that time, now, while your freckled noses
and your equally brilliant smiles
tell me about school,
about stolen moments with friends, running through fields,
jumping in rivers,
fishing for frogs,
and I feel tears clawing my eyes,
because you'll never be babies again.

You'll never come looking for me
showing me something small,
wishing it big.

(Though, this is you, now - small,
wishing to be big,
and getting there so fast
that sometimes I worry that time has sped up,
and I am being pulled along against my will)

Did I appreciate those times?
Did I gabble back to you in baby talk -
listen to your tales of woe,
when parents thwarted your plans -
an auntly duty, best performed when punishment
is not your game, as it was sometimes mine.
Or did I pass those times as if you would be there
young and fresh
mine and wholesome
for longer than these short years?

I hope not.

I hope that every second of your growing up
has been my growing up too.
And, after all, you're not so old yet,
my first niece and nephew,
and there is still time to listen to more stories,
to tell you things you did not know,
to hear your happy laughs,
and see those too-big teeth fighting for dominance
in your still-a-baby mouth.
Ten years.
Ten years of knowing you.
Ten years of loving you.

17 July 2008

P.S. I'll update on actual life soon.....just a wee thought that kept me going while I was travelling and missing home so much - that my gorgeous, hilarious, and always amazing nieces and nephews were waiting for me here!!